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How do you look right now?

I look like crap. Even worse with flash photography, unfortunately. I’d look like a pale-faced clown with flash.

It’s 2 in the morning and you get a text message, who is it most likely from?

It’s going to be from my mom, telling me to get home since something had happened to her or my dad.

What are you most talented at?

Most talented at… hmm. I don’t think I have any specific stand-out talent. I guess I know how to do a lot of things. I know how to do a lot of things in a more than mediocre way. Not entirely stellar or great but just slightly better enough to be un-mediocre. Could that be considered a talent?

What is your worst nightmare today?

I had a vague dream last night of my father at the brink of death, and some lawyer coughs up some sort of final will that was read out to us. The family ends up divvying up the remaining possessions and most of it end up to an unknown charity. And a few of us receive keepsakes from my father. Apparently, I get all of the photographs he ever took in his career. I’m not really sure how that is actually a nightmare or how it is the worst, but i guess it’s just that it’s recent and I think it is really sad.

What was your favorite TV show when you were growing up?

I watched a ton of TV when growing up, I guess that’s what my generation mostly has in common. As a kid though, I got into arts and crafts and I remember loving to watch this livelihood TV show which featured different livelihood craft projects. I think I did attempt to make some of them, failing miserably, but then I never really had a knack for business anyway.

What is your concept of a fruitful day?

Getting errands and chores done, hitting the gym, writing and reading. Sounds like a tall order, but yeah. I have high demands of myself sometimes. But most of the time I just end up doing one or two of them things and wallow in self-disappointment.

What did you like best about your hometown?

I really don’t know. I don’t know if I like anything about it specifically, I know only a few things that are being done here what isn’t done anywhere else. Well, not really, I don’t know anything at all unique about my hometown. I guess it’s always been there, unintrusive and unimpactful at the same time.

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Tell an inside joke you share with your friends?

I can’t remember any specific inside joke that I have shared with my friends. I don’t know. Well we do laugh about things that happened to us in the past, quite often but nothing specific comes to mind right now. I guess I am not really a “joke-y” kind of guy, neither are my friends, but in some circles, I would consider myself occasionally funny. Occasionally. In some circles.

Do you work out every week?

I try to work our every week, but sometimes I miss my bed too much and opt to lie down instead. Some people say that it’s actually a yoga position, so I guess most of the time I am still doing yoga. In bed.

Did you grow up in a small or big town? Did you like it?

I grew up almost right mack in the city. Our street comes about a main national highway, although we’re still a bit more tucked in that we don’t get too much of the noise that comes with the traffic. It’s not much a a neighborhood in general, but our house is in a compound of apartments which share a common inner yard, so I guess we had most of our childhood spent playing with direct neighbors. As we grew up, the location made much more sense since it was within a few minutes of anything substantial, and commuting was convenient, traffic aside.

Do you pick at scabs?

I remember what my mom used to tell us when we were young, my three other brothers and me. She said that we had legs like girls since we didn’t pick at our scabs, unlike our girl playmates and neighbors who had a lot of scabs on their legs. It was weird hearing that from our mom, but it was true. Until today, my older brother, the one before me, has what has got to be one of the smoothest and whitest legs on a guy you’d ever seen, and they’re not even that hairy. In local terms, his legs would be compared to long radishes.

Oh wait, could this question possibly be referring to psychological scabs, or is that just me overworked and too tired to think of a coherent thought right now? I don’t know. Maybe for another post: picking at psychological scabs.

How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have?

I have had a few boyfriend flings, and a couple of girlfriends. I have been around, on hindsight, but that’s not my scene anymore.

What would you want to say to your latest ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend?

I had this idea of writing letters to my exes before, and maybe some of the people I had dated in the past. I guess I got happy too soon that I got over it and moved away from that project. I may want to revisit that soon, I suppose but yeah, I say it could get in the way of my happiness for now. If i had anything to say to any ex, all of them, I guess: have fun. Hahaha.

Can you live without internet?

I saw this post on Facebook the other day about a job opening to be a hermit in Austria (?). The job is to stay at a beautiful cliff house with no electricity, heat or internet for a few months. It doesn’t come with a salary though, and it wouldn’t exactly be a hermit life since there would be visitors coming in to sink in the few and all. For a whole eight minutes I had seriously though that this could be a great “job” (it doesn’t really pay anything, so must be called some volunteer thing), for me. But than I realized I was looking at it on my phone.

So, no. I don’t think I can live without internet. I have come to the point that I have too much invested, financially and psychologically, in connectivity already to be able to go back to a life without it.

what defines me

Hello, you again. I’m actually on my way to our team outing right now. Spending time making conversation about random things while on the road. The guys on the driver seat and riding shotgun got to talking about music while the both of us at back are silent. I didn’t think that I’d be silent too but I guess I don’t really have anything much to say.

This got me to thinking, what defines me now?

I don’t have anything that defines me. I don’t have any specific quote unquote interests anymore so to speak. I think I am just floating around randomly.

I used to be interested in music. I was in an office band with my work colleagues and we got into a few gigs. But now the only music I have is basically off my automatically curated Spotify playlist. So I barely know anything current anymore really.

I used to be interested in books. But then who has the time anymore. I could barely keep up with my Kindle reading list of Pocket articles. And we’re not even talking about full books or novels now, just random web articles about anything and everything. The last set of novels I read would have been Game of Thrones. And I haven’t even actually read Harry Potter, save for the first book.

I used to keep a blog. Not much traffic on it, but I was sort of able to keep some form of consistency in the frequency of the posts at least. I miss that, being able to do that, writing consistently. Now I am barely doing any writing at all save for moments like this when I cold even barely keep a coherent thought in my mind much less put it down in writing.

Hmmm. What else? I used to be interested in technology. But then I found it to be a pretty expensive interest. A few gadgets and phones later, I found myself on a BlackBerry, with an OS slowly but surely dying, with the Android runtime which, yes, allows it to run Android apps, but only barely, never the updated ones. I don’t even play Pokémon Go, just because it’s stupid to do so on a tablet. And I don’t even use Snapchat.

Forgive me Panic at the Disco! can really be distracting even if you know the lyrics but could barely keep up with the song.

Back to the topic at hand, I don’t have anything going for me really, in terms of anything interesting. If I was to write a resume for myself about my non-professional life, that would probably fail a lot more miserably than the fact that I did not graduate on my professional resume. I’m so blah, uninteresting and unbrilliant.

I’m just pretending that I am.

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If you could travel in time, you would…?

Not travel in time. That is a wasted proposition. Travelling to the future would change the future anyway, it would throw your destiny in a loop and what is perceived as the future becomes the present and the future becomes different altogether. Travelling to the past is also simply useless since the past is already done and over with, and I think if you try to change anything in the past it would again just be the same thing, because even of you change it, events would conspire again to bring you back to the point when you actually can and would have the chance to travel back in time to change that thing you changed in the past in the first place. So, you end up going back to the future which is the present, and things would go on just as it would have in the future.

What chess piece do you remind yourself of?

A pawn. A lowly useless pawn, moving one step a time. Aren’t we all just pawns?

How do you feel about when a child disobeys?

I am not totally against it. I am not a parent material to begin with but I am said to be quite strict when it comes to children not of my own. I think a child disobeying is just a child following the natural course of inherent curiosity. I would get mad if a child or my child would disobey but then I guess they learn from those things, I mean they should. By nature, man learns things that are wrong mostly from experience, and then some by group think and what society tells us. For a child to disobey, maybe he is just testing the waters trying to find out why anyone older would say that in the first place. If now the kid knows what are the consequences of his or her action, then he or she can make an informed choice on whether he or she would choose to do that or “disobey” again.

And then you find out that your kid actually has a psychological defect.

What is the possession you have that you like best?

It would have to be my mobile phone, a Nexus 4. Apart from getting it on sale almost 20% off online, it does a lot and it keeps me entertained/preoccupied most of the time. I mean, that is one thing that I would very much hate to lose right now, my phone. Plus, since not many people have the same kind of phone, it makes me look cool.

How do you like to celebrate New Years’ Eve?

I have never celebrated that many New Years’ Eves away from my family, except for that one time that I was working the night shift on a holiday. I never had attended any large parties for New Year either, with those big fireworks shows and concerts and heavy drinking. All of my New Years Eves so far have been sober, unexplosive, slightly sparkly, hearty, family affairs. I think I would rather keep it that way. But then again, I don’t know any other way to celebrate it, really.

When you feel distant and uninvolved, what are the challenges to do something about it?

Again, here’s another weird question on my roster. I have been thinking to do another review of these things again one time in the future, but then that’s a lot of work and I don’t have that much of an attention span to this blog of late, really.

When you think about it, the only real challenge I can see in that is the challenge of not bowing down to the pressure of society to remedy feeling distant and uninvolved. People are more social these days than ever before. We have a host of social network we’re in to and a lot more a popping up online which are more or less different amalgamation of others that have come before. For as long as there is something that can be shared, people would find a way to share it. (Looking into the future, I guess we’d be able to share smells as well to our friends on something like Facebook. I think something like that should be called Sniffbook, that’s just me.)

What does “being open” mean to you?

I should and would be the last person to be asked this, since I am admittedly I think the least open person I know apart from total random strangers, which, in turn, I do not know, so that just makes me the admittedly least open person I know. And come to think of it, how well do I really know myself?

My definition of being open is sharing with a foresight on how other people would be able to digest and use that information which is shared. I think everything should be applied as a use-case scenario. We have too much information flooding us every single day and it is indirectly stressful for people to digest more things shared that they would not find purpose for in the future anyway. I think my friends should know better. At least understand me when I am not as “open” as they would wish me to be. If it’s not something that is useful now or later in the future, then it will never be useful, and it would just be a waste of time sharing it.

Romance is a decision. How do you feel about that?

Are you afraid of change?

Anyone in their right frame of mind should be. Anyone who is not afraid of change must either be too naive or partly dumb, or just is not human enough, with feelings and fears and everything. People are creatures of habit I read somewhere and change is a break from that habit. We tend to create patterns of how things should turn out in the future, we feed on managing expectations everywhere including our own lives, even for the smallest things. If I press a button, this happens, and I expect that to happen the next time I press it. But then change comes along and screws everything up. We are suddenly in the dark on what will happen next and then our minds start creating scenarios from the most simple and safe ones up to the more scary things that could happen, sometimes bordering on the impossible. That is fear: recognizing that something is unknown and out of one’s control.

So yes, I am afraid of change. Anyone would be. But that doesn’t mean that I cannot embrace it as well.

Do you believe it is important to be on time?

All my professional life, I have been told to be on time, be on time, be on time. And I must admit, being on time is not exactly my strongest suit. Even when I landed a managerial role, I never had imposed upon my team something that I did not uphold for myself. So, given that, I think the next few lines would sound like a defense but then again, yeah maybe it is.

I choose to take a more practical approach when it comes to timeliness or promptness, so it seems. If it is not essentially critical that anyone, meaning me, of course, be on time, then I take my time. Otherwise, I do try my best to be on time, or at least be there, or at least give notice if I am not going to be on time or not be there at all. The thing is, other people have lives too, i understand but, unless specifically mentioned that my being on time would matter that big of a deal in their lives, aside from if the matter of keeping my attendance in check is the whole point of the exercise in the first place, then I would consider myself as in your way or just in it for the ride: I do not matter that much and neither should my being on time be.

***I must say, this was a fairly good mix of questions. Even if I had already grouped the questions and tried to randomize them as much as I could, I was pleasantly surprised on how good this post turned out.

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What is your favorite season?

We only have two actual seasons in the Philippines, the wet and the dry season. I would very much prefer the dry season over the wet one easily because it is a lot easier to get around, like to the beach or around town, when it is not raining. Not that the question every really asked why I liked the dry season, but hell, what the heck

What’s your favorite song to sing in karaoke? Why?

The reason why I love singing in karaoke is that it makes me feel like I can sing. It’s actually a talent that have deteriorated over time, better concealed at most, and only unleashed when faced with karaoke microphone and more than a bucket of beer. I have a lot of songs that I love to sing in karaoke, though I have attempted to compose a steady set list one time or another and that was met with either a very long list, or some songs that are just not on the karaoke’s list. I am still looking for a karaoke machine that has legit versions of Hall and Oates songs, though.

If you could have a condiment dispensed from your navel, what would it be?

Salt. It occurs naturally on the surface of the skin, I think I read somewhere that’s the reason why dogs like licking your hand, because of the salt. That and because of body shots.

I still can’t believe I once _____________.

Told someone “I love you” not because I actually believed it but just because it seemed like I had nothing else to say. And worse, I was trying to convince myself as such when I don’t really even think it logical to do so.

What are your goals for living?

Goals-shmoals.

If you were stranded on a deserted island with one book, what would you want that book to be?

A book that would teach me how to get back to civilization: a boy scouts’ handbook.

How many doors do you have in your house?

This sounds like a very weird and stupid question.But props, it did make me think about it. There are a total of eight doors in the house. One for the veranda, one for the laundry area out back. Two for the bedrooms upstairs, one for the bedroom downstairs. One for the bathroom, one for the dirty kitchen. And one front door. And of course if you count the doors in the cabinets and the cupboards, that will be an additional fifteen.

If you were to be a natural element, which would you rather be: fire or water?

Fire. I like to destroy stuff. And because neither Iceman or Aquaman are totally as cool as the Human Torch. If that even makes any sense.

If you could visit any place in the world where would it be and why?

This could potentially be a very long list, but then again, it could be a bit different every time. The easiest answer to think of right now would just be Russia. Why? Vodka.