I don’t know what ticked me off today at work but I feel like hitting someone. I do have someone in mind already, but I’d rather not say. There have been a lot of things going on at work and a bit more outside of it lately, and I think I do need a bit of break. Or maybe I am just anxious with the trip coming up in almost a week. I dread leaving the office because if nothing happens while I am away that only goes to show how ineffective a leader I am. I remember what Terry mentioned to me the other day while we were chatting online: I’d eventually grow into it, or something like that. And that these feelings of inadequacy will soon melt away, as I do more of what I am good at, or something to that effect. And that I was brought to this position for a reason, and that my superiors believe in my skill and talent, or whatever I had, and that I can definitely pull off the demands of this post. I don’t know. I think I ultimately want to hit someone in the face right now.
I have too cool down, lest I suddenly explode unwittingly on one of the members of my team or worse, someone who’s not. And there are a lot of likely candidates. Maybe that is why I am not attracted to driving that much, I can already feel my potential for road rage. Nor am I drawn in to weapons or guns, or ultra-violent RPGs. I fear I do have the tendency to snap.
I will have to get coffee before I actually hit someone.