down time, lazy time

Spending time alone at home is something that I really love to do. I don’t know how it started but I guess some part of me had always enjoyed being alone and never was comfortable in hanging out with other people that much.
I was thinking of writing something last night but waking up a few hours later, those ideas have gone out of me altogether.
I am doing this in front of the TV right now so I don’t expect much to come out of it, really. I’m just trying to wiggle in a few sentences every so often for the next couple of hours while watching How I Met Your Mother marathon on cable.
Obviously this is not a very good exercise. Instead of getting things down, I end up ruminating more about them in my mind, and of course I know just how fast I can exactly type them all down. To think that I have been using a keyboard for more than 15 years, I still haven’t mastered anything but hunt and peck typing.
What is bugging me right now?
One thing that I have noticed with my life is that I always gravitate to doing things that actually make me depressed. Like browsing Facebook. Watching silly movies about love and shit. And doing nothing. Putting myself out there, and having big expectations of people and hen ending up just being left alone. I don’t really know.

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