mutual friends

and i am resisting the urge to stalk you right now,
can i talk to you now?
it’s as if it’s been only a couple of minutes
make that five
years ago since i did and then
never again

but the sight of your name
not the sound of it
i cringe when i think of hearing your name
never again, i can’t imagine why
what the hell

i want to see you but i don’t want to
see anything that is you, for even i cannot
bear having to think about this over and
over and over
again, every time
every single fucking time
your damn uncommon name comes up

somewhere it always does.

shit. i am doing this just for myself.
you can see me now, i let you
into my life you can peek all you
can you see where i am right now

or would you rather not look too.

i cannot resist.
but i know to be cured
of this
i should.

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